Text and photo by Maria del Espiritu
Deciding to enter the narrow and steep road and staying on it is a difficult decision to take.
We Carmelites are mountain-climbers in spirit, not in any way to mean climbing a mountain physically but similar to taking a journey that is just as arduous and requires stamina. We are said to “climb the mountain of Carmel” in which we hope to reach the peak—that is, complete union with God. This is our goal; nothing else should deter us.
Climbing the slopes
In a recent hiking expedition that turned out to be a mountain climb, I started the climb with other family members—bringing some gears and gadgets in place. It felt like a simple walk in the park (it was a park, after all) and that the gadgets would be useful in some way. When we saw the map and realized we would scale the peak of the mountain, it got us immediately excited. Off we went hurriedly.
As we passed through easy plateaus and craggy steps, the higher we went. My bag, bottled water and jacket were beginning to bear so much weight. The air was frosty but I was already sweating so I had to remove my jacket. My husband could not go any further and decided to stay where he was and just wait for us. After a short while, I decided to go further but leave the rest of my things behind. My son decided to stay with me just to make sure I was safe.
I proceeded to scale up the mountain, not resting for a second as dusk was fast approaching. After a long wait, I reached the summit with my son and was treated to a beautiful sunset and a view awash in fading colors. For a brief moment I decided no camera can ever capture the serene beauty of what lay before me. I had to sink in the view, thanking God for His providence and His strength.
Taking only what is necessary
I realized then and there that I did not really need a lot of things to accomplish the ascent. I only needed what was necessary—my determination, common sense, and a whole of grace! And it is pretty much so in spiritual life. Nothing else matters—material comforts, recognition, ambition. These weigh us down from what should really matter, to what is really necessary in our lives.
And this is how our relationship with God should be. I now understand a little better the purifying value of St. John of the Cross’ “spiritual darkness” of the soul, how it is sustained by grace and by the words of St. John Paul II, “demands intense spiritual commitment”. What only matters is what is in our soul, equipped with the graces bestowed by God to a soul who asks earnestly.
As I reached the summit I was thinking about this realization and how it gave me comfort that I decided to stay on the path. Never mind if I looked like a mess afterwards!
And the things I left behind? I never needed them in the first place.
Maria del Espiritu is a member of the Third Order Carmelites in the Philippines.